A very inventive use of the prompt. I would never have thought of an exploding cornflake. The lion’s comment after he exploded made me smile.i wonder what lion heaven is like. My only piece of advice would be to try using different time connectives to make the writing flow better. Well done.
A very inventive use of the prompt. I would never have thought of an exploding cornflake. The lion’s comment after he exploded made me smile.i wonder what lion heaven is like. My only piece of advice would be to try using different time connectives to make the writing flow better. Well done.
I’ve just noticed the lower case ‘I’. I should take my own advice and proof read before I post. Oops.
Yes, it could flow better but it’s a lovely gory story!
I like the use of the one word sentence for effect.
Hint: Perhaps use speech marks for speech next time.
this is very good frankie
well done girls
WOW! This is an extremely good piece of writing! I loved reading it x
WOW, Frankie Kira this is really good I think that this should be on the special showcase it is so good only you cold use some speech marks!
well done for using your imagination. I liked your vcabulary