the unexpected visit

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3 Responses to the unexpected visit

  1. Riley says:

    nice wow words i liked how you made it so intense also nice use of punctuation you kept good suspense throughout your story.

  2. Nathan says:

    That is a great story but make sure it makes sense and doesn’t end in a cliff hanger but if it does it needs to keep the reader in suspense.

  3. spaine says:

    Katie, a great piece of writing. You have used punctuation and short sentences to create real tension. I want to read more and find out what happens. That is always good when the writer leaves you hungry for more. Well done. Mr Paine

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