Your story brings some questions to my mind: What did the boy’s voice sound like? What did the figure look like? Was the figure moving when the narrator saw it?
You story has the tone of an eery mystery. Nicely done! It think if you add a few more small details that answer those questions, your story would be even more scary.
Keep writing and using your imagination!
Jilanne (team 100)
Brilliant idea, Zak. Remember down is not spelt ‘dawn’.
The mysterious figure is very thought provoking. I enjoyed reading this alot.
Hi Zak,
Your story brings some questions to my mind: What did the boy’s voice sound like? What did the figure look like? Was the figure moving when the narrator saw it?
You story has the tone of an eery mystery. Nicely done! It think if you add a few more small details that answer those questions, your story would be even more scary.
Keep writing and using your imagination!
Jilanne (team 100)
This is very good Zak! Well done! lyl xx
Good Ideas Zac! It was and enjoyable read.