What an interesting response to the prompt words for this week’s challenge. You had an excellent idea and have used a range of powerful words to engage the reader. You have ended with a cliffhanger that makes the reader want to read on further. I particularly liked your adverbs to start sentences as this is something that I have been encouraging my class to do but many children have found it difficult. If you have time, please look at our blog http://4sunnybrow.weebly.com
Keep up the great work!
Miss Potts (Team 100)
Durham, UK
Your story is suspenseful and very well written. Your use of adjectives and adverbs make it easy for the reader to visualize your escape. You may want to think about changing the word order in some of your sentences; for example: there was a huge lake surrounding me. This is a great piece of writing! Keep up the good work!
What an interesting response to the prompt words for this week’s challenge. You had an excellent idea and have used a range of powerful words to engage the reader. You have ended with a cliffhanger that makes the reader want to read on further. I particularly liked your adverbs to start sentences as this is something that I have been encouraging my class to do but many children have found it difficult. If you have time, please look at our blog http://4sunnybrow.weebly.com
Keep up the great work!
Miss Potts (Team 100)
Durham, UK
Your story is suspenseful and very well written. Your use of adjectives and adverbs make it easy for the reader to visualize your escape. You may want to think about changing the word order in some of your sentences; for example: there was a huge lake surrounding me. This is a great piece of writing! Keep up the good work!
Achieng, I really loved this. Great load of suspense. left me wanting to read on
wow Achieng!, that is epic
Achieng, it is so awesome WOWCHER